Details for The Old Familiar Bitter Taste |
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How do I begi
Good Evening, Jour
Muck it. I hate this. I hate you. Father. Mother. Dear Scarlet. Aunt Wilheminia.
Why can't you just leave us alone?
Why do you have to hate that I'm not in Slytherin, Father?
Would you want me to be like Alphard Black?
Hate those that aren't as pure as I? This mottled ingrate that for two moments a few minutes a day before the sorting hat was placed upon my head, I thought of all the hatred that mother and Aunt Wilheminia bear towards one another and just wanted it to stop. To learn about why people get so mad at one another. That if I only knew, that someday I could break this non-existant spell of rage that grips you all into thinking that somehow angsting against one another like children will solve problems.
So the sorting hat put me in Ravenclaw for that desire to know more about something just to fix it. I probably can't. I
can't. I can't. I can't I can't I can't (Angry scratches across the parchment that at some points tear all the way through the sheet) ---
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So, father? How's the golden girl, Scarlet doing? As I, your wretched good-for-nothing son other than dishes sweeping laundry shining your bloody shoes tending the greenhouse sitting in my room not making a bloody peep when I'm home over the summer quietly sit by and watch from an outside window because I coughed too loud and you put me outside, teach me how to be a real man since I didn't make it into Slytherin from the Ravenclaw House of miscreant children who let down their parents
Mother. Why does your bloodline have such rage within?
Esther I can't I won't I'll never
I don't know what to write about you that won't get torn up and burned. We had such a lovely day today. It felt normal out in hogsmeade with you. I really hope your mother in all her finite wisdom is requested by grandmother and grandfather to come to the christmas and new years parties. Then maybe I could at least see you somewhere other than in this bloody castle. Today with all it's sweetness, reminded me of that old familiar bitter taste forced down our gullets by our families.
I feel like I could strangle someone.
((Watermarked circles dot this portion))
Why can't we be together, Esther? Your mother and mine just hate one another so much, that's why.
It's like they don't want us to have any kind of happiness just because of my house. I wish I could make them all dissappear and we could just inherit everything of theirs except their stupid childish bickering. I want to scream it out from the top of the castle. in the middle of the great hall. run into your arms whenever I see you. I must play my part, shouldn't I?
What am I becoming?
I feel like strangling someone.
I should have been in bloody Slytherin.