| Details for Jan 16 |
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Today was a better day.
Today there was no one who was unbearably sad and most of the people I came across were smiling. Even the boys who were sad. I wonder if they found five things. No one said so, if they did but the sadness didn't look as consuming.
Today was a good day, too! Because I got to visit with Uly and Tartar, who's name I should probably rethink only Quin…hmm. That might work. Quin. Quin. Quinny. He probably won't like it. I wonder if people know that's what I do to help me remember them. I wish I wasn't so dreadful with names. I also wish I hadn't stubbed my toe this morning on the way to class, because it's still a bit purple and there ought to be a charm for that.
Cousin Brendlyn says there is, not just for toes but all sorts of bumps and bruises. She's a Healer, a proper one. An actual nurse at St. Mungo's and though she says it'll probably be a while before I can master it, she's going to send me the spell so that I can be practicing. I hope so. I hope I get it right. I watch the mail come every day, hoping that the letter is from her but she's busy and I understand that.
She was one of Papa's cousins and in her youth, she used to sing. But one day she said that she wanted to be able to do more than just help make people smile and decided that she was going to be a healer. Now she really gets to help people. I can't wait to help people like that. Maybe I'll get to work with her this summer if I get an apprenticeship. I really hope I do.
I hadn't realized that Tarquin and Uly and Variel were all friends either, until today. I probably should have, they have all the same classes and were talking about those books that Tartar and Uly love to read but then the conversation turned to girls. I wonder where they fit in the future. Somewhere, probably. But maybe not. Because it was ours. They want to be famous curse breakers and travel everywhere and take me along with them to help keep them better.
I guess it would be okay to travel and I'll go, if Uly says too. But…it would be nice to get to stay at home, too. To have them both at the bank where I know they'll be safe and everyone comes home alive and in one piece every night. I don't want to lose anyone else either, even though I know it's been hardest on Uly. Even though Momma's still alive. It feels…it feels like she's gone in so many ways.
Is that what being in love is like? Being gone? Or having something so wonderful that when it leaves all that's left is a ghost of a shell and a woman who smiles but doesn't seem, at the time, to remember their children? I think something is wrong with her. Really wrong. I think maybe Uly knows it too. I think that's why he tries so hard to make everything so good for us at home, when we're there. To keep us distracted so no one notices. I think it was easier too, when we were younger. I'm worried about her, but there's nothing can be done while we're here and she's there. At least I know she's eating.
But that's not a happy thought. Today, today is for happy thoughts and tomorrow, tomorrow is the start of the Hogsmeade weekend and I'm very much looking forward to going. I'm hoping I can talk Uly into going out to the farm with me and maybe Tarquin and maybe we can find some new books and I can go see if there's any new critters in and…
Today's List:
1. Frog shaped pancakes. (I pick too many things food related)
2. Flowers that look like teacups.
3. Me, with pink hair.
4. A traveling bed and breakfast for curse breakers.
5. Waking up with Mister Sniffles sleeping in my hair.