(1937-08-24) I Scream for Ice Cream
Details for I Scream for Ice Cream!!
Summary: Recipe Espionage and Shelta Revenge
Date: August 24th
Location: Ulric's Oddball Malt Shoppe, Diagon Alley
Related: None

Ulric's Oddball Malt Shoppe Diagon Alley
Fri Aug 24, 1937 ((Fri Aug 24 03:52:07 2012)) (B,2 W)

It is a summer late afternoon. The weather is warm and fair.

Malt shops seem to have the universal ability to turn adults into children again, without the use of magic and Uric's Oddball Malt Shop is no exception. The malt counter, its wood polished to a high shine and cushiony bar stools lined up in front, provides a place for patrons to sample all manner of drinks that fizz, foam and steam. A long section of the counter has also been set aside for rows of glass jars with chrome lids filled with all manner of sweets, Muggle and Wizardly alike. And for those that want a little more privacy or for the couple on that romantic date tables have been set out on the malt shop's floor with seating for two or four.

Akilina has that wide eyed, muggle-born stare that's magnified by 75 through her bottle lenses. With a wrinkle of her nose to push the sliding frames back up her nose she squints and gives a little sniffle as she meekly steps into the malt shop. She moves like every step she fears that she's going to step on something and it will come alive and squeak and skitter away like it happened in that magical creatures place a few shops down. Yes, it couldn't be more evident that this little girl is adjusting to life as a wizard.

The shop door opens to a muttered, "Yes, Mother." A harried-looking Hephaesta limps into the malt shop, a sack in one hand. A faint clicking a whirring can be heard with every other step. Only when the door swings shut does the young teenaged girl seem to relax a little. She brushes her windblown brunette locks out of her eyes and finds an empty booth to set down her purchases.

And just moments after the door closes behind Phae, Jo comes in, a little breathless as if she perhaps ran to catch up. "Hi, Phae," she calls behind the older girl, and then steps further inside, towards the counter.

Carmichael stomps in through the door, "Ulric, you good for nothing bastard! Where are you!?" Carmichael starts glancing around. Seems he's quite good a ruining a nice, pleasant time. "I know you've got your spies coming to Farin Braw! You can't trick me, Ulric! I see through your German lies!"

Akilina shivers and gasps and plasters herself against the closest flat surface when the angry scotsman comes shouting his way in. First squeaking Puffskiens and now barking cooks! Today was not the greatest day for her brother - who was distracted by his friends - to introduce her to Diagon Alley it seems. Unfortunately the surface she plastered herself against was a hidden door and the souls of her saddle shoes squeal as they rub against the floor as she's slid in an arch until she's facing the wall with the door still against her back.

Ulric is the man, non-other that was using the door. "I am right here Meester Carmichael. Again, I will remind you that I am from Sveden and I do not have any use for your ridiculous recipes, for the millionth time, my Scottish friend. I make candy und tasty shakes and malts. I have no need for your yorkshire pudding, and pea soup! So vhy vould I send these spies, hmm, hmm? Now, have a chocolate and smile a bit, it vould do you very good."

Hephaesta gives Jo a happy smile at the greeting, but before she can properly say hello, there is a rampaging Scot saying very naughty things. She stiffens, staring wide-eyed at Carmichael.

Jo jumps as the angry Scottsman comes in, but other than shock at the sudden yelling she doesn't seem too bothered. She looks up to him and rolls her eyes, and she spots the girl her age being slid behind the door. "Hold on," she says to Phae, and quickly makes her way to the formerly hidden door to find the other girl. "Hi. Don't mind them, adults are strange sometimes. I'm Jo..Josie," she adds.

Carmichael continues ranting and raving, "Swedish, German, Japanese; it's all near as makes no difference!" He prods the Swede in the chest with his finger and says, "Of course you don't need those recipes! The customers would laugh you out of business for your sub-par presentation!" He cackles madly and shakes his head, "Don't try to trick me with your sedatives cleverly disguised as treats! You Spaniards and your voodoo! It never ceases!"

Akilina seems quite fine behind the door and she offers to Josie when offered to come out. "Yes, fine here. Thanks." She even reaches to pull the door a bit more to really squish her in. "Just please let me know when I can make a dash for it?"

Ulric seems about as unphased by Carmichael's outrage as Jo. He doesn't even look down at his chest when it's poked at. "Zee next time you think that there is a spy in your leetle hole in zee wall. Please, feel very free to call a Heetvizard. Unteel zen, Adjo!"

Hephaesta, a bit shamed that a girl three years her junior is unrattled by the ranting Scottish cook, pulls herself together and limps up to the counter. "I…I would like a chocolate malt…please," she says timidly, hoping concern for a child might break up the confrontation.

Carmichael just stands there with his hands on his hips, he scoffs in outrage and says, "Hole in the wall!? I garner more business in a day than you do in an entire week, and I don't even use hallucinogenics to trick the children! I trick them with quality meals at afforable prices!" He pauses and thinks for a minute, hearing Haphaesta, "Give me a chocolate malt, aswell!"

Josie smiles to the other girl, and says, "Come on out, it's ok. Can have something to drink too." She wanders back over to the counter by Phae, whether Akilina follows her or not, and adds, at all the talk of chocolate malt, "Me too, please!"

Akilina sneaks out and rather shadows behind the much more brave 11 year old than she. Keeping Josie between herself and the man with a mustache she's not seen since a picture of her great grandfather back in Russia! Pushing the frames back up her little mouse like nose she squints at the menu and hmms before peeking inside of her little coin purse. "I'll have a fizzy water please." That only costs a knut. Which she has!

Ulric, for just being threatened by a mad Scottsman seems to be rather his usual jovial self. "Enchanted Chocolate as usual Meez Davies?" Is asked as he moves around behind the counter.

Just as everyone is settling down the doors burst open once more and a pack of young Blacks come gallivanting in like they own the place. Lucretia, Walburga, Alphard, Dorea, and Charis Black all make their way to a booth and sit down. Alphard is continuously shaking his hand and blowing on a busted knuckle he has. "Stupid Pikey has a face like a brick wall." He grumbles at his sister. "Man up buttercup." Hisses the eldest of the bunch, Charis.

About the time the Black's are settling down and demanding attention from one of Ulric's servers a young irishman comes walking in like he were out for a Sunday stroll, never mind the fact that his face looks like it went through a gauntlet of punches and lost, terrible. He's in pain and probably has some busted ribs from when Alphard kicked him while he was knocked down in the alley-ish nook besides the Malt Shop. Alphard didn't like losing the money he was going to spend in her on Colton's 'Find The Pea' game. So here he is, to show the Black's they can't keep this lad down! Spindling the galleon he just won off of Alphard over his own battered knuckles Colton strolls right up to the counter and slaps the coin down. "Flos onmeh Ulric."

Hephaesta glances sidelong at the young toughs. Between the Blacks and the cook, the malt shop was seeming less and less inviting. Still, she's placed her order, so she waits patiently for it. The new boy gets an awkward smile as she tries to decipher what he said. Trying to keep her mind off of the tension in the shop, she turns to Jo and Akilina. "So…um…Jo. How have you been? Um…how is Miss Fawley?"

Josie nods quickly to Ulric with a grin, "Yes please!" She glances back curiously as the Blacks all come in. Of course, she's clueless about the pureblood family or their reputation, so she just says, "Hi," cheerfully, if any glance her way. And she waves to Colton too, wrinkling her nose as she sees his battered appearance, "You ok?" She looks back to Hephaesta and says, "I'm fine! Camilla's busy today, doing work. She helps look after hurt creatures and stuff, from all over."

Carmichael kneels down next to Colton and raises an eyebrow at him, sipping at his malt. He licks his lips and says, "Tell me, boy." He gestures over to the group of miscreants and says, "Did they do this to you? Hrmm?" Both of his bushy eyebrows raise as he asks the question.

Colton winks a blackened eye at Phae and ends up having to squint that eye closed because the act made blood dribble down from the gash in his eyebrow. "Phae love, goodunyah. An iffisnae Jo!" He tilts his head so he can peer at the two future first years next to the girl he knows from Hogwarts at least in passing. "Who yeh godder?" Usually especially at school he's much better about speaking the King's English when he's not around his family, but he's honestly trying to rub his up bringing in the Black's faces.

Ulric seems to have understood Colton's order and after setting down Chocolate Shakes, one with enchanted animal noise chocolate before Jo, and one with special chocolate with a spicy kick that makes smoke come out of the quaffer's ears to Carmichael, for his all high and mighty superior palette.

When approached by Carmichael approaches him more blood oozes out of his eyebrow as it rises in a mirrored expression that Carmichael gives him. "Wha dish? Nae, tryin' onnah new look. Tink it's pretty dashin' donchyeh?" He gives the older man a carefree wink as he takes the tray of root beer floats Ulric prepared for him over to the Black table, smiling at them like they were his closest of friends "Tashow no'ard felins."

Hephaesta's eyes are locked on the tray of floats, widening more and more the closer they get to the Blacks. That feeling one gets in the pit of the stomach right before something catastrophic happens tightens up in her, and she instinctive moves to make sure Carmichael is between her and the Black Pack.

Josie glances over too, and then says to Akilina, "You going to Hogwarts this year too? I can't wait!" She's turned well away from Colton and the Blacks. She reaches to take her drink and sips it, and then makes a super-realistic horse whinny sound that sends her into giggles.

Akilina opens her mouth to answer Josie about her future, but then she blinks owlishly and her glasses slide right down her nose and bump on her upper lip when her head jars backwards when suddenly Jo lets out that whinny. The little muggle-born just sits there, stunned.

Carmichael stands up from the floor and takes another sip from the malt, raising an eyebrow to Ulric as he sets it down on the bar, "It needs more cayenne, Swede." He 'hmmph's and straightens his coat out, waiting to see what's going on at the table.

Ulric still unrazzed by Carmichael's gruff nonchelantly leans over the counter to squeeze some more chocolate into his malt, just as the smoke erupts from his ears, "Vou should really not try to think so hard about what mean things to say next. It is showving in the smoke coming out your ears my dear, good Scotch. You have such precious little there, don't burn it all avay."

Hephaesta jumps in surprise at the horse-whinny, but it does break the tensions, allowing her to momentarily forget what is about to happen…whatever it might be. She giggles at the animal sound, mumbling, "I'll bet Miss Fawley likes that."

The Blacks all sneer and call Colton rather the likes of the 'N word' for his heritage. Alphard sneers before taking his drink and slurping it down, "Oh look, the Pikey's learned a lesson in where he belongs, /serving/. What a good little Pikey." The younger Blacks snicker a little bit uncomfortably, but they are trying to support their brother. Charis shakes her head and slides her tall malt glass over to her brother so he can chug it down too. For some reason Colton just continues to grin at them like they were his best friends. He only starts to step away when a little bit of froth starts to show at the lips of those Black's that took drinks, it's of course worse in Alphard who chugged the most.

Josie nods quickly to Phae with a grin, "She's the one that showed me this. It's fun. Can make you sound like any animal at all." She looks to the other 11-year-old then and grins, "Wanna sip?" She's still purposely paying no attention to Colton or the Blacks.

Carmichael twirls his moustache and smirks at Colton's play against the kids. He chuckles slightly and tugs the wrinkles out of his jacket. He groans at Ulric and says, "Oh, shove it, Swede." With that he just backhands the drink, sending chocolate across the counter as he makes his way out of the door.

Alphard Black's belly is quickly expanding, inflating even and soon the foam at his mouth starts to dribble down his chin as he looks wide eyed for help at his siblings. The youngers are too busy looking a bit panicked themselves, but they aren't inflating, just looking a bit rabid. Alphard though is soon enough spewing gouts of thick froth foam like you'd find in a too fizzed up root beer float from his mouth. Charis who was just wrinkling her nose starts to scream and crawl over the back of the booth as the spew of foam splashes towards her as her brother starts to claw at her to try and draw her back in order to help him! By this point Colton is back to sitting on the stool at the counter watching what's going on at the Black Table with a rather satisfied expression.

Akilina is looking rather like she's trying not to throw up, her glasses splattered with chocolate malt makes her meep and convulse as the worst fear that it was Root Beer Float and not Malt that just splashed her has her slipping and sliding in the foam on the floor running in terror for the door. He brother, who was more experienced with this world than she can't be too far! "ALEXEIIIII!!!"

The sight of the spilled chocolate reminds Hephaesta of her own malt. She came in here for sweets, after all! She sips cautiously, concerned that she might suddenly bark like a dog or let out a bird squawk. But then…it happens. The catastrophe! Oh, what has Colton done? Phae watches in growing concern as Alphard inflates with foam. Seeing as things are starting to get messy, she urges Jo over to her as she climbs up into the booth where she set her shopping bag, getting off of the floor.

Ulric gives Colton the stink eye, "Zat was not very nice Colton. Vat have I zaid about your leetle tricks?" Tsking the Malt Shop owner grabs a mop, bucket and pulls out his wand and comes around the counter, "Go, before I clean zeese up unt you get in big trouble!" He advices Colton.

With a wink to the girls climbing up out of the mess he gives them both a bloody (literally) wink and hops over the counter to take the back exit through the kitchen. Stealing a candy apple on his way out.

Ulric seems rather adept at cleaning spells and even knows a good spell that deflates Alphard rather quickly. More embarrassed than injured Alphard screams in a very high pitched way threatening Ulric and his business as he scrambles himself for the door screaming for, "MUMMY!"

Now, Jo can't help but look towards the Black table, and her eyes widen. She's quite quick to follow Phae to the shelter of the booth and quickly pulls her bare feet off the floor. She looks a little disappointed as the other girl her age runs screaming, but her attention is quickly back on Alphard.

With Ulric taking the situation into hand, Phae feels a little more at ease. She sits up on the table, feet on the booth bench, sipping her malt while she watches the events wrap up. "I think we'd better not ever accept food from Colton."

Josie nods emphatically in agreement. She adds, though, "He's usually pretty nice. I think that guy might've been the one to beat him up. That case, it was good revenge." She settles in too, though, and takes another sip of her drink, and ends up meowing like a cat.

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