(1937-09-17) The Lewd Fuzzy Conga
Details for The Lewd Fuzzy Conga
Summary: Cooper takes note of Bannon's appreciation for good pens and disdain for conga lines.
Date: September 17,1937
Location: Department of Magical Law Enforcement
Related: No Thanks

Law Enforcement Ministry Of Magic - London
Mon Sep 17, 1937 ((Mon Sep 17 19:44:15 2012)) (Level 2)

It is a summer evening. The weather is cool and overcast.

The Department of Magical Law Enforcement is the wizarding world's equivalent of the Department of Justice. The first thing to see upon arriving on this level of the Ministry is a waiting area with a few comfortable chairs lined up against the wall and some tables with old magazines on them and a small potted plant. All of it facing the duty desk. Behind the duty desk one of the officers of the Magical Law Enforcement Patrol sits the watch, doubling as receptionist and bouncer. Behind him is a large open space with desks full of paperwork where other officers of the M.L.E.P discharge their duties. Along the walls of the larger room are large bulletin board full of maps, pictures of dark wizards and witches, clipping from the Daily Prophet, and other miscellaneous items. Within a corridor leading deeper into this level of the Ministry doors open to the Auror Office, the Hit Wizards office, the Improper Use of Magic Office, the Misuse of Muggle Artifacts Office, and the Wizengamot Administration Services.

Deep in thought, Cooper sits quietly in her cubicle, a thumb running over her bottom lip as she is paused at the typewriter. There's a bit of noise and activity starting back up in the MLE office since lunch is just about over and people are returning to work. Not Cooper though. She skipped out on the midday meal to get ahead on this case. With some luck perhaps she could even sneak out of work early today, but they always find something extra for her to do. With her glasses on, she sorts through some papers to her right, massaging the area between her brows as she does so.

Bannon enters the office, having been out of the office completely this morning with no word to anyone. He moves past the front office and into the working area where the Hit Wizards and Aurors go about their daily tasks. He then skips that as well, moving to the outskirts where all the case information and wanted lists are posted on the walls. He moves down them, his walking stick tapping on poster after poster until he seems to find the right one. He turns towards it, drawing his wand and making a slashing motion towards the paper. Burning into the parchment is a simple word that every Auror loves to see on the posters posted prominently: Captured.
He gives the poster a smug smile, "One more for Azkaban." He turns away from the poster, returning his wand to his walking stick and moving into the cubicle area and past Coopers desk. He stops, turning around and moving backwards, "Good afternoon, Cooper. Things coming along nicely now?"

Of course, when has Eddie Malfoy NOT taken a lunch? Probably never! Though she does certainly keep her eyes open for anything suspicious during her lunch breaks, she enjoys them all too much. She steps back into the office with a husky, open laugh to the Hit wizard she'd gone to lunch with. Apparently, he just said the funniest thing ever, or Eddie is enjoying flirting with the rather handsome, dangerous man. "Shoo, shoo! Go. Back to work. People will start talking!" She insists to him, brushing him off her arm before she turns on the ball of her high heel and stakls back into the office to see the small change on the posters. Her brows arch, impressed. "Another one, Bannon? Mm… Someone's looking for a promotion. Or perhaps just some nice patting on the head when mid winter comes?" She flashes the other blonde a smile. "Miss Cooper. Did you truly work through lunch? Goodness, I'm KIDNAPPING you out of here tomorrow if I must!"

The sound of the man's voice makes make Cooper look up momentarily and she turns around her seat to find Bannon at the entrance of her cubicle. "Very nicely. Very nicely indeed," she herself carries a pleased smile, "Although you'll want to talk to Worthington later He wants you with me when I take the next step on this. And I won't lie, I'd rather do it on my own, but you know the protocol on newbies." She gives a rather self-loathing frown when she calls herself a 'newbie'. Eddie's entrance makes Cooper actually stand up though and with a smirky grin she says, "I always know when you're back Miss Malfoy. Is he the same hit wizard from yesterday? Does he have a friend?" Hopefully, Eddie will realize that she's only half serious. Hopefully. And at her offer for a kidnapping, Cooper replies, "Lord, an auror kidnapping another auror? -That- is story for the papers for sure!"

Bannon nods his head with a smile, "Well done, Cooper. It is all a matter of finding the proper rhythm of things." He tilts his head slightly to the side, then shrugs, "It is what it is. The Chief wishes primarily for you to remain safe. There is nothing wrong with a second wand on an assignment." He glances up towards Eddie now, shaking his head, "Nothing of the sort, Malfoy. Special Aurors do not see nearly enough field work, and nobody pats my head. Ever." He then goes on to explain, "I'm merely doing my part to warm Azkaban in the winter with cries of remorseful dark wizards, rather than allowing the heating bill to remain a drag on our resources as a community of witches and wizards."

The lovely young Cooper always makes Eddie smile, the women getting long well enough for working in the same office. She scoffs a bit and shakes her head, leaning against the counter with an elbow and looking down to Cooper's desk, "They're still baby sitting you, dearie? What a shame. You could kick the behinds of half this office, I'm sure!" She states not too loudly, but isn't bothering to hide the words. She then blinks and grins a bit widely to Bannon, reaching out to actually pat his head, unless he ducks out from under her touch. She laughs huskily again, "Well, darling, still, quite a good job with it. I'm going to have to pick up the pace or you might be showing me up soon! I'd hate to look like I was slacking off in comparison to the great and brilliant Bannon! Mm… Maybe I should take young Cooper.. the ladies can show off together for a bit?" Eddie asks with a lofting of her platinum brows.

Cooper leans back in her seat, fingers lacing behind her head as she props her boots up on a stack of papers under her desk. There's a smile of amusement that spreads on her face as she listens to Bannon talks about warmth and heating bills. Her eyes looks to Eddie to see if she's hearring this and then looks back to the man to say, "That's deep, Bates. Deep." To Eddie though she shrugs and says, "Yes, well I am the baby and I suppose I need to be sat. They've given me a fairly decent case load but if I need your help I'll definitely be at your desk. Trust me."

Right after those words are spoken, a rather adolescent-looking ministry worker steps hesitantly into the office. He looks like a new Hogwarts graduate and is fairly nervous about being around a bunch MLE workers. "Is there a … Bates, er Auror Bates here?" he calls out to the office, reading the label off a plain brown cardboard package he's carrying.

Bannon tsks, "Hardly a baby, Cooper. Babies are defenseless. Were you defenseless, you wouldn't be sitting at that desk. The Initiate program is more akin the restriction of underage sorcery. The restriction keeps very powerful kids from tearing the world apart. The Initiate program assures the ministry that you are able to apply your own considerable powers correctly and lawfully to the apprehension of misusers of dark magic." He looks back towards Eddie, ducking the pat on the head with a warning glare before he shrugs and replies, "You should know by now not to bother with the numbers. Our statistics are merely a line item on the Minister's desk and a blurb in the Prophet on occasion. Anyway, I'd like to take Cooper on this one, Malfoy. I'm attempting to gauge her strengths and weaknesses." That seems to be all he'll say on the matter as he looks towards Cooper, "Deep or otherwise, Cooper, I'm merely doing my part, which was the point I attempted to make." He peers towards the recently graduated MLE worker, narrowing his eyes and glaring towards Cooper. He looks back to the young man and gestures out the front door, "Bates is in the loo. You can find him there."

"You are not a baby, Miss Cooper. You're a young Auror who is never going to really learn anything if they don't keep telling you to hold onto the tails of someone's robes!" This might be why Eddie never gets to train the new ones. "But. Bates there is a fantastic teacher, and I trust he won't make it too easy on you. He doesn't want to completely hog the spotlight after all, right, Bates?" Eddie gives the man a too-sweet smile that holds the fierce protectiveness she holds over Cooper, and Cooper's career, behind it. And then she adds, on a complete side note, "Oh! Mm… I don't know of Johnny has a friend, but I'll ask? If it means you actually take a bloody lunch, Cooper, then I'll make certain he brings someone along. It's a date!" Done and done, at least by the tone of Eddie's voice.
And then the question of where Bates is comes up and Eddie just smirks. She reaches one hand out and smiles ever so sweetly to the one bringing in the document, "I'll give it to him as soon as I see him. I can sign for it, or whatever, dearie. Hand it over!" She orders with the husky voiced promptness of a Malfoy who always expects to be obeyed.

Cooper's big blue eyes peer between Eddie and Bannon as she holds her hands up defensively and says, "Alright alright. I'm a not a baby!" Self-deprecation must not be too common among Aurors. She needs to write that down somewhere. But the assurance from the two elder co-workers certainly makes her feel a bit better, which is evident in her light smile. "Well so long as that friends knows that I'm not really looking for anything too serious. I just like to have fun with a nice every now and then y'know?" she grins and shrugs at Eddie. And to Bannon she says, "Well of course I understand that Bates. You always do your part in helping. And I appreciate that…" Her words trail off when she hears the boy come in. Huzzah, her appreciation has arrived. And the second Bannon throws her a firey glare, she puts her feet down and slides back up to her typewriter. In a casual yet rushed tone she suddenly dismisses the group, "Alright well I have things to do. Let's all get back to work then."

The adolescent boy is first confused and doesn't know who to give the package to now. He replies to the male auror with an "Uhm…" Until Edwarlinda steps in and he automatically shakes at the woman's authority. Perhaps there's a bit of a blush there to when he hands her the clipboard that she should sign. And when she's done, he'll hand her the box that is about a food wide and 1.5 feet tall. It's not to heavy and on the label it reads 'To Bannon Bates' along with the office's address.

Bannon reaches over, intercepting the clipboard before Eddie has a chance to sign it. With a glare towards Eddie, Bannon replies succinctly, "This is none of your concern, Malfoy." He sets the clipboard back on the box which the young MLE employee is carrying, "Loo. Slide it under the door with the feet sticking out from under it. Surely he'll sign it and slide the clipboard back out to you." He turns the boy around and gives him a push, calling after him, "Wash your hands!" He looks back towards Eddie again, "You need not be so rude as to involve yourself in this…" He looks towards Cooper, "Cooper… Why is that box so large?"

Oh now, Eddie KNOWS something is up. She is about to sign when Bates does actually intercept the clip board and commands the poor kid to the loo. She doesn't reach for the clip board again or try to get the kid to turn the package over to her, but she does turn sharp gray eyes straigth on Bannon now, her hands resting on her hips. "Should I introduce the poor boy to each of us, perhaps, and see what he has to say then? What is this about the loo? And why is that package so big?" She then turns her arctic gaze on Cooper, not letting the woman rush back to work at all after that, "What is going on here and why is he redirecting that package? This makes no sense! Why couldn't I sign? You shouldn't have things you need to hide coming to the bloody office." She huffs a bit.

Cooper shuffles through some papers and begins typing away at the typewriter, the metallic clicks sounding over all the commotion which is starting to attract some attention from others inside the office. With mild irritation she replies, "How the heck am I supposed to know what's inside? S'not my package. I've got work to do so if you two are going to argue take it away from my cubicle." The lie comes out with a fairly cool demeanor. No wonder she worked as a spy before. And taking no more questions she simply continues on with her work.

The boy is simply confused now after stumbling forward when he's shoved in the direction of the bathroom. At first, he thinks about running away. These people are crazy. But suddenly he spots a cubicle with the nameplate 'Bannon' on it. So he turns around on his heel for a moment and quickly spews out, "Right well if he's in the loo, I'm just going to leave it on his desk here. Forget the signing. We can overlook it this one time. Thank you." So that's what he does. In sheer fright, he drops the package on Bannon's desk and then runs for the exit. Never again.

<FS3> Opposed Roll — Bannon=Awareness Vs Cooper=Deception
< Bannon: Great Success Cooper: Good Success
< Net Result: Bannon wins - Marginal Victory

Bannon glances towards Eddie, shaking his head as he replies with an exasperated tone, "She thought it appropriate to get me a gift for simply doing my job." He then looks towards Cooper, pausing for a moment then glowering, "You overdid it." He moves over towards his cubicle, drawing his wand. With a quick criss-crossing s-patterns waved in the air, the cardboard of the box ignites in a column of heatless flame, leaving the contents of the box unharmed and sitting on his desk. He's ferverantly hoping that this is really a gift Cooper sent and not simply some head a serial killer has sent him (like three others this month already).

The interaction between the two definitely tells Eddie that she's missing half the story here, and isn't quite enough of an office gossip to care. Though she looks momentarily worried about Cooper, especially as Bates put the gift into flames. She shakes her head slowly. "Miss Cooper, if you decide you wish to work with another, you know where my desk is." And then her ice eyes loft to Bates and she smirks red lips coldly in his direction. "There are days you are more heartless than I, Bates. Be certain your entire existence doesn't become your job — it's a fast road to madness." And with that little lesson, Eddie turns on the ball of her foot and waltz off towards her desk area. She should actually work at some point this day.

"I gave him other options. He -chose- this one," Cooper rolls her eyes and explains to Eddie before continuing to type. But when Bannon stomps away she quickly throws a semi-frightened 'thank you' to offering to work with her.

The burned off packaging produces two things. One is a fluffy light brown teddy bear and the other is a smaller box that is about the same size as the ones you get your checkbooks in. On the top of the box is a card, when opened it will read: "To the Master of Transfiguration, Saved you the trouble of making it and just got you one. Sincerely, the Master of Gift Giving." The real present itself is a very high quality fountain pen with a gold tip. 'Bannon Benjamin Bryson Bates' is engraved onto the side.

In her cubicle, Cooper discreetly picks up her wand, waves it in the direction and whispers something. And suddenly the bear on Bannon's desk comes to life. It stands up on its two hind legs and begins to do a dance where it shakes its furry rump left and right while it rolls its two stuffed arms. Kind of like as if it were leading a congo line. All the while it sings in an adorably cute voice, "Thank you. Thank you. Thank you for helping me! Thank you. Thank you. I couldn't have done it without you!" It's singing begins to attracts other MLE workers who peek over their cubicle walls to find out what's going on at the man's desk. By the end of its song, the bear raises his hands up in the air as if waiting for Bannon to give it a hug. And should he not give the little fellow an embrace, it'll simply repeat its song and dance until he does.

Bannon looks first towards the teddy bear, then towards the box. It's at this point that the term 'gag gift' enters into Bannon's consciousness. He looks at the pen, then towards Cooper. Pen. Cooper. Pen. Cooper. Pen. Cooper. Then he smiles, "Well, you surely did your homework. You even spelled my name correctly. High marks, Cooper. High marks…"

He trails off when the teddy bear begins to sing and dance, his jaw slackening as he watches the routine. He considers it for a moment, glancing towards the wand in his hand. He raises it high and then narrows his eyes. With a sweeping gesture, he pulls the wand down and begins working over the teddy bear with a low murmer in the back of his throat. It literally takes him a minute and a half until he lowers his wand, in the process, the bear falls silent. He reaches over, taking the bear off the desk and setting it on the ground. Bannon returns his wand to his walking stick, a smile on his face. Bannon gives three quick raps on the ground with his walking stick, and the bear comes to life again.

In the space surrounding the bear, sized in volume to match the bear, the introduction to Strauss' Blue Danube plays as if from a rich grand piano. It creates a far more intimiate sound than the full orchestration. The bear raises slowly to its feet during the introduction, like Pinnochio rising with the first breaths of life. The bear makes to its feet, leaning into a polite bow, and then raising back up to its full height after a moment. Its right hand stretches out in front of him, while its left hand reaches out to the side. As the music begins playing, the bear begins moving through the full nine positions of the waltz to the rhythm, as taught by dancing masters across London. For his part, Bannon begins tilting his head left and right to the beat of the music. It repeats the waltz twice, using a sizable portion of the hallway space between the cubicles until it comes to a stop, giving another bow and then falling to its botton, an inanimate teddy bear once again.

Bannon looks towards Cooper, nodding his head with a satisfied smile, "This is a dreadfully good looking pen, Cooper. Smart even. Thank you very much."

While Eddie had mostly escaped the scene, she wasn't running across the office, so she's still very much in visual and audible range when the package explodes and out pops.. A teddy bear? A singing teddy bear? And a smaller box? Eddie blinks, stopping in her tracks and turning around slowly so she can lean her curveavous hip against the edge of someone's desk and fold her arms across her chest. She cannot HELP but stay and watch this. Bannon's antics with the bear in turn, however, draw a warm smile across her crimson mouth and she brings both hands up in an appreciative, warm clap. "Inter office politics have never been quite so interesting as with you here now, Miss Cooper. And you might be melting his stony little heart. Huzzah, my dear, huzzah."

Cooper pops up from her cubicle once she hears the bear fall silent at first. She was worried. Sincerely worried that perhaps he may be preparing to set the poor thing on fire. Of course she only comes out enough to pop her head out to the side, her big blue eyes peering out from behind her cubicle wall. Blue Danube is a bit unexpected. And Cooper along with the rest of the office falls silent watching in awe and occasionally giggling at the graceful bear. Once it's finished its class act, all the Aurors stand up and applaud the bear as if they had just watched a ballet. All except for Cooper who has crossed her arms and is every so slightly hurt. "Your welcome. But if you really didn't like the congo-line dance then you should have just told me. I would have gotten you something else," she pouts over at Bannon, but goes to pick up the bear and return it to his desk. "It's tainted now."

Bannon tilts his head, looking towards Eddie, "Stony little heart, hm? Well, you've surely proven that you don't know a damned thing about me. Had I had a stony… little… heart… as you say, I wouldn't be having the conversation with Cooper that I'm about to have. So please keep your judgements of me to yourself." He then turns towards Cooper as she returns the bear to the desk, "No, you never asked what I thought of conga lines, Cooper. I think conga lines are vulgar and crass. However, I'm not about to return a gift just because I don't like it. That would be rude." He then pauses, perhaps seeing an inter-workplace drama increase, then continues, "Cooper, that bear would not have stopped until a trigger was met. You didn't seriously believe that I would perform that trigger for all to see in my workplace, did you? Were you particularly attempting to embarass or shame me in some fashion?"

Edwarlinda gives a small salute in their direction, but she doesn't further interfere, actually going back to her work now.

"Shame hmmm perhaps not, embarrass well I yes, only because I told you so in the first place. And there -is- a trigger. The command is 'dormite' and its written on its bottom," Cooper says turning the bear over to show the tag, which apparently has instructions on it. She sighs and simply puts the bear on his desk to do…well whatever. "Fine fine, no conga lines then," and huzzah, Cooper gives in and leans against the wall of his cubicle. "Just enjoy the pen then . It's supposed to be never ending, non-staining ink that why it didn't come with a ink bottle. But I hear it last for about a decade before it turns into a regular fountain pen. So you'll have to get ink after that." Even wizarding magic hasn't caught up with never-ending technology.

Bannon replies sternly, "It means the same thing, and yes, you said you would embarass me. I never said I would let you." He takes a few deep breaths, glancing towards the bear and repositioning papers to make an open corner for the bear to lean up against. He picks up the pen again, looking it over and then nodding to Cooper, "It really is a nice pen, Cooper. Thank you, but you surely didn't mean to. I'll have you know that I place the success of young Aurors high on my list of priorities, without agenda or alterior motive." He settles down in his chair, "You'll be a good Auror one day, Cooper. I merely had to show you that fact. Mission accomplished." He looks around the office by poking his head above the cubicle. He settles his walking stick to the side and adds, "It looks like the commotion has yet to draw the ire of Commissioner Ogden, so…" He tosses his head to the side with a grin, "Back to work with you."

Cooper acks and immediately turns around to see an irritated Ogden stepping out of his office. "Shit," she says and rushes back to her desk. All the while muttering, "Shit, shit, shit, shit…"

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