(1937-09-25) Porridge and Put-Downs
Details for Porridge and Put-Downs
Summary: Lunch takes a snarky turn at the Leaky Cauldron.
Date: 09-25-1937
Location: Leaky Cauldron
Related: None

It's another wonderful day inside the walls of The Leaky Cauldron. Whatever troubles one might find throughout the day are instantly forgotten about as they step through the door…or the wall. One could almost hear a cheerful band of woodwinds playing as Damien Huddleston, the Man in Purple, walks in through the door looking as charmingly befuddled as usual. He walks over to a table and sits down slowly, looking around…quite stupidly one might say.

Before the door even has a chance to swing shut behind Damien, Annie bustles into the tavern. Her cheeks are ruddy from a brisk walk in the chilly air, and her perpetual smile looks somewhat bemused, as if she'd just heard a joke and is still thinking it over. She makes a beeline for the bar, putting in an order for a cider before looking around, loosening the belt of her jacket to let the garment hang open.

Already seated there, and apparently on a second, or perhaps third brew, Jack Dodderidge seems to be taking something of a liquid lunch, stealing the bits of food off the top of the bar when it's in reach. He's slouched a bit, and as the door proceeds to allow yet more through, he cants his head to the side, watching with dark eyes. He's in work clothes now, and if one were familiar with muggle 'fashions', the mark of the RAF on the shoulder. He's got hastily cleaned greasy hands, however, as seen as he brings the glass forth and empties it before placing it atop, near an empty bowl of nuts with a satisfied *thump*. A slow smile wanders across his face as he straightens, a sly one to see the man before her too.. easy mark.. and offers a nod to either that'll answer him.. "Oi."

Elly is one of those sickening people that the moment their feet touch the floor from rolling out of bed they are lovely, put together and bright and cheerful as the rising sun. Humming and softly singing as she cleans off a table from it being occupied by a swarthy crew of Sea Monster Hunters she gives Damien and Annie a warm sunny smile and wave of the hand amid all of the pleasant jiggling as she manually swipes and buffs a cleaning rag over the large circular table. "Be right with ye loverlies." After righting up she bustles over to the bar to get Jack a refil, when it's delivered she reaches up to fix his hair a little bit. "Special today is Chicken stuffed with lentils, cherries, n' cheese. Soup of the day is porridge, and pea n' bacon."

Damien sits quietly at the table he's found and drums his finger idly across the wooden surface. His eyes widen as he spots the rather cold-looking young woman. He gives her a big wave. One of those waves that indicates that he's not all there and speaks up, "Elly, access your immense quantity of darlingnesstitude and bring this poor girl some broth. She looks positively freezionic." The man at the bar receives a kind-hearted smile.

The wave can't miss catching Annie's attention, and she directs her bright smile his way. "Cor, that's kind of yeh, ta." The ever busy Elly gets a warm, "Hallo, Miss Elly. Yeh look fine today." She looks over to Jack, and her smile doesn't fade, as it has been prone to do on previous encounters with the young man of late. It's a cheerful and friendly, "Alright Jack?" that goes to him before she takes her cider in hand and steps to Damien's table. "May I sit?" she asks of the man who is thoughtfully concerned with her state of being.

Jack's short today, as evidenced by the coins upon the bar; happens to be all that he's got for the day. Smiling tightly, but still more than friendly for the cheerful Elly, he shakes his head. "No'today, Ells." Why, of course, isn't mentioned. "This'll," and he gestures at his glass, "be m'last before I hang me 'ead down fer a bit." Though, a glance is given over towards the gent what offered Annie a bit of soup. "Aight.." is given in response, and twisting in his seat fully, he leans back, looking for Elly again, at least with his words. "'o's the bloke what's payin'?"

Elly counts out the money Jack has on the counter and smiles softly at him, "Porridge or Pea n' Bacon loverly? Ye know it's a free drink to go with it. That's Mister Huddleston. Critic for the papes." Then she smiles over to Annie, "How bout some porridge with some dried fruit Annie love?" The a flirty wink over to the generous Damien, "An wha does the object of me darlingesstitude would like today?"

Damien stands up from his table and waddles around to pull the chair out for Annie, "Absindutebly!" He'll wait for her to be seated before wobbling his way back to his own chair and sitting down once more, brushing something off of his velvet trousers. "Can't have a young woman such as yourself walking around positively Siberian." He ponders a bit at Elly's question and says, "I believe…" He stops for a moment, pondering a bit more, "I…believe I'd like a dry martini. Do you have those here?"

A nod goes to Elly, and Annie says, "That would be brilliant, ta." She always knows just the thing, Elly does. Damien's curtesy is gratefully accepted, and Annie slips off her jacket before sitting in the chair he's offered. She eyes his attire, looking positively fascinated. "Is that velvet yeh've on? It's lovely, and so well suited to you, the purple."

Jack twists about a moment and gives Elly a smile; it's a rare one.. what that it's not got that edge to it. "Porridge, ta.." Cheap, easy, warm and filling. Something'll that carry him on to tomorrow. He brings a hand up to now slightly less unmussed hair; a piece that was annoying him, and he gets back to watching the table. "Prophet. Couldn't be a Muggsy in that getup." Muggles and squibs make it to the Cauldron, after all. "They'd eat'im alive." Louder now, his Cockney sounds a bit stronger, "S'a trick, Annie.. t'get ye to feel his velveteen. Watchin' yer 'ands, I am."

Elly gives Jack's cheek a soft little 'I've got your back' kiss and then she bustles into the kitchen to get the food together while her father, Mick is behind the bar grumbling a little bit about making a froo froo drink like a dry martini. Soon enough she comes out of the kitchen at her bustling pace. A bowl of porridge is put down for Jack on the bar with a little wink, she's given him a little treat of some thick bacon laying over the top of the hot thick porridge in the shape of a six pointed star. Another beer is also put next to it and she lifts a finger up to her lips, it'll be their secret. Then Damien's martini is deliverd and a very colorful bowl of porridge is set down for Annie. "There ye go me loverlies."

Damien beams brightly at Annie and says, "Oh! How lovely of you to say. Yes, I've always had a penchant for the more violaceous of the vestiments." He claps happily as Elly provides him with his beverage, saying, "Oh, Elly, if my eye had a small, delicious, red fruit inside of it, it would most definitely be you! When shall I set the wedding date?"

Jack's comment brings a laugh from Annie, and she holds up her hands for him to see. "Shall I keep them in plain sight for yeh then, Jack?" she teases lightly. "Ta, Elly," is added as the porridge arrives, "It looks delicious." Of course, everything here is delicious, so that's a pretty safe bet. Damien's word choices bring a sparkle of amusement to her eyes, and she looks over at the man as she takes her first taste of the warm porridge.

Jack can hear his stomach growling with the aroma of the porridge, and the anticipation. The thick slices of bacon is just.. and he grins lopsidedly, giving him that distinct boyish cast before he picks up his spoon to start into it. "Ta, Ells.. I owe ye.." Certainly not one.. and with the addition of another brew? Heaven! Glancing at the other table, he pauses in his meal in order to nod in Annie's direction, "Right.." before he calls over towards Damien. "Oi.. she'll no'marry th'likes o'ye. She'll need a real man." Like him?

Elly bends over to give Damien's cheek a smooch now, she answers him the same answer she always gives to that question from him. "Februrary tirtinefh, thirteen o'clock on the spot. Stairs o Wincester Chapel, m'loverly." She winks to him and then sets down a small pitcher of warm honey for Annie. Then it's a bustling she goes to tidy up another recently vacated table swatting Jack with the clean rag as she passes by him. "Mista' 'uddleston is a real man, 'e knows 'ow to treat a lady like a lady. Ye be nice, or no bacon." She wags a finger at the cockney scamp before she bends over the table to gather up everything into the clean rag.

Damien looks over at Jack with a raised eyebrow and says, "Oh, I was not aware that the definition of a real man had been changed to mean 'a fetid encroachment on civility with a face like an inbred Swede'. Silly me." He then smiles at the man and says, "Now, would you like another pint or would you much prefer to insult me once more?" He answers for the horrid man by gesturing for Elly to ring him up on Damien's tab.

Seeming to pay more attention to the food before her rather than anything else, Annie really can't say anything in defense of Jack for insulting a stranger. Nor can she say anything against the stranger for giving it right back in proper fashion. Instead, when there is a pause, however small, in the skirmish, she smiles to Damien, "I'm Annie Taylor. Very pleased to meet'yeh." Maybe it'll throw them off track, maybe not, but she's making an attempt.

"'Spose I'd meet a real lady, an' I'd find out, right?" Jack turns about to take on his porridge, and the insult comes. He has to cock his head, his jaw setting to the side as he processes it. He's not stupid, not by a long shot, but it does take him a moment. He turns about, his brows rising. "You know.. dress like that sort'a dandy, an' they'd think ye t'be the granson of crazy, inbred German George. Syph eats the brain.. but if that's your definition of a man, 'ave at it." He holds up the new pint given with his meal and gives the man a raised toast, "In yer eye.." before taking a swallow. "Yer turn."
He looks to Elly again.. and Annie, brows raised in askance. They like that sort?

Elly does another pass by Jack, she taps her wand against the bottom of his mug and the liquid vanishes from the stein, "Warned ye to be nice." She then gives Damien a hen pecking, "Don't ye start either. Both o ye, enjoy what's before ye, 'fore I have to teach ye a real lesson in etiquette in my place."

Damien offers his hand across the table to Annie and smiles, "I'm Damien Huddleston. The pleasuredness of this meeting is all mine, I assure you." Damien rolls his eyes at the man and says, "Och, I would continue, but I'm afraid I may break that fragile brain of yours. Though, I must remark that the only people who say I dress as a dandy are the ones who can't afford such opulent accoutrements. Or a quid to get another round of beer." The last bit is said with a bit of a snide tone that's quite uncharacteristic for the man." To Elly's scolding, he dips his head in acknowledgement and says, "I'm sorry, my dear. Just having a bit of a row." He sips lightly at his glass, setting it down softly on the table.

Annie's hand is still a wee bit chilled in Damien's grip, but her smile is warm enough to make up for that. But Jack has to keep on, and Annie turns to give him a questioning look as Elly handles the admonishments. Still, the crack about money hits low, and Annie looks back to Damien, speaking up quietly. "It's not a sin to not have money, Mr. Huddleston. I have t' say that without yer kindness, I'd likely be going back to work with a bit of an empty feeling myself." She had only ordered a cider until he was kind enough to speak up for her, after all. Her eyes drop and she blushes lightly, having had her say, her attention seeming to focus again on her bowl.

The disappearing ale elicits a shocked 'Oi!' from Jack, dark eyes widening in the insult of the now bone-dry glass. He mutters as he puts it down, though now the insult given about the fact he's not got a couple of farthings to rub together brings him to his feet. "Say tha' again mate.." he begins slowly, and he looks to Annie, shaking his head. He doesn't need the help.. "C'mon.. the fac' I've got a fragile brain.. an' jealous o'yer finery.."

Elly raises up her hand with her fingers poised to give a hard snap. The pub stills, every one that has been in the establishment more that twice knows that that snap isn't magical at all, but instead it only summons her mother out of the kitchen. Which is a worse fate for anyone one being uppity continuously after a warning from the wench than a cruciatus curse. The elder Lady Dodderidge is known to be the polar opposite of Elly and is fierce with cutlery and frying pans. One more rather strict sounding from the normally very warm wench, "Dat's enuff." Her blue eyes give Damien and Jack both that mothering 'going to put you over my knee if there's one more PEEP!' stare down.

Damien sips his martini and looks across at Annie, saying, "It's not a sin to have it, either. Although, I am sorry if I had offended you when my dander was up." He looks over at Jack and says, "I shall not continue this line of conversation with you. Now, conform to the lady's wishes." He gestures to Elly. But then the threat of seeing that horrid older woman that somehow spawned Elly pops up and Damien grows quiet, sipping slowly on his martini once more.

Oh heavens, this is just getting worse. Annie looks to Damien kindly, "No offense taken, and I am very grateful for your thoughtfulness." She hesitates before saying anything more, her eyes going to Jack, and then Elly brings… the threat. Her eyes widen; she's not born witness to the elder Dodderidge on the warpath, but it is indeed legendary. And not something she's keen on her friend possibly having to be subjected to. She stands, not quite finished with her porridge, but concerned for Jack. So, at risk of him just right out snubbing her, she asks, "Jack, do yeh think yeh might walk with me back t'work?"

Jack's on his feet when the threat to snap happens … he knows what'll happen directly after that sound, or rather, who will appear. He raises a still black-greased hand to a bit on his forehead and gives a brief tugged salute, complete with a slightly dipped head. He's lost his apetite, and with a wistful look to the porridge that is now missing the bacon and only a couple of bites from it.. and the empty glass, which he now sets upon the bar, he shifts his jaw, his cheek twitching. "Sorry, mum.." Dipping his hands into his pockets now, he mumbles an excuse to depart.. something about work. Or the lorry. Or more aircraft that'll need his attention.. or somesuch.. before he goes to make his way from the 'Cauldron. Lifting his head at the request, his brows rise in askance; "Yah, sure.. li'brys on the way."

Elly is back to her usual self when apologies are leveled and such and she even gives Jack's cheek a fond smooch. Annie is given a hug and she tells them both to hold on a moment and she bustles about to duck into the library soon returnning with little to-go cauldrons with little iron lids and offers them both, one to Annie and the other to Jack. Filled with their left overs and Jack's even has some bacon tucked into it just under the lid. "Ye two take care."

Damien folds his hands in his lap, looking after the two patrons that are leaving. To Annie he gives a polite nod, "It was delightful meeting you Miss Taylor. Perhaps we can talk again under better circumstances." He flashes a smile at Elly and says, "I come back from being out and about in Lima and this is what I come back to? For shame, Elly. For shame." He's obviously just teasing his favorite bar-wench, as evident by the twinkle in his eye.

Annie slips her jacket back on, about to step after Jack when Elly asks them to wait. Pulling the belt tightly about her waist, the young witch takes a step toward Damien, reaching to pat his shoulder lightly. Cor, that really is velvet. "Yeh've been very kind, and I look forward t' seeing yeh again." She'll hold no grudge just because a couple of boys can't get along together. The take away cauldron is accepted with a smile, a bit of motherly tending she's not had since her own mum last did, those years ago. "Ta, Elly." A kiss goes to the woman's cheek, and then Annie looks expectantly to Jack. He might not think her 'a real lady' but she'll wait for him to open the door to escort her back to work.

Jack stands properly for that smooch, and an abashed, sheepish expression comes.. though it's gone once Elly's on to the next, Annie. As Elly returns with the little cauldrons 'to go', his shoulders slump a little. He can smell the bacon in it. This'll defintely hold him through dinner and into tomorrow. By then, he'll have a bit more after the morning, though half of it'll go to the meter. "Ta.." and again, there's another tug at the forelock before he looks to Annie expectantly, his expression asking 'ready'? Damien gets a .. nod, and he's off towards the door, pulling it open first before Annie's sent through. "Ou'cha'go then." Once outside, it can be heard before the door closes, "Ye had t'get a feel, didn'cha?"

Elly pauses in her returning the kiss to Annie's own cheek to put her hands on her hips and playfully chide Damien, "Well ye came with wif the manners of a llama from Lima, Mista 'uddleston." Tongue is poked out at him before she returns to preen over Jack the moment before he heads out the door. Then it's back to the hustle and bustle of tidying up.

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