(1939-10-20) Regrets
Details for Regrets
Summary: Angelus and Madeline talk about why things were done and what's right.
Date: October 20, 1939
Location: Gryffindor Common Room, Hogwarts
Related: After the Storm

In the wake of all the chaos on the school - with most of the students excited, and gossiping, and running about - Madeline has found herself a quiet corner of the common room. Or, at least as quiet as she could find. She has her text books piled next to her, with her Defense Against the Dark Arts book open in front of her, and she's reading and scribbling away on parchment with a determined look on her features. If she's going to get back into her classes soon - then she'd better catch back up. Why'd she let herself fall behind?

Angelus had disappeared into one of the private places of the castle, at least until it got taken over. So the youth heads up the staircases, keeping his head down and his hands in front of him. He only lifts his head for a second to murmur the password upon reaching the common room entrance. The two wooden halves of his wand (plain, with the blue vanity handle nowhere to be seen) is in his hands. He hardly knows what’s in front of him as he walks, focused on fitting the two together futilely.

What talking had been going on in the common room stops in the face of that particular site - prompting Madeline to look up from her work. She bites her lip, then spits out abruptly, "Why'd you do it?" She wears a cautious, uncertain look on her features, and grips her quill tightly enough that she may just snap it, if she isn't careful.

The other Gryffindors in the room seem to think better of interrupting an attempt at a conversation between these two.

Angelus stops at the question, just short of bumping into a table, which he notices just then. He slides back a step from the table, lifting his head for only a second to glance at Madeline. His eyes are glazed and glassy with tears, his lips curling in annoyance as he looks swiftly back down. The pieces of wand are quickly moved down beside him, fingers wrapping around them. “Why do you care?” he shoots. “You must be delighted.” Turning away, he attempts a subtle brush of his fingers under his eyes from, he suspects, most of the housemates that must be staring. He draws in a breath, trying to gain strength as he looks back to Madeline. “If there were Aurors here, Evans, then it’s important. If they’re going to do good than they need to know if there’s something foul about. If the Flint is dabbling in Dark Magic…” He shakes his head, glancing around the room. “It was the right thing to do,” he murmurs out, looking towards the fire as his fingers tighten around his wand.

"I don't know…" Madeline answers quietly. "Not delighted, just…" She looks away from Angelus, and down at the table, her expression thoughtful. So… he wanted to do what was right? Has he always been doing what he thinks is 'right'? "It was very brave," she says a bit grudgingly. "Which is very Gryffindor." She jabs the point of her quill at her page repeatedly. "But if you'd do this, because you think it's right, then what you've been doing for the Magijugend 'n Flint all along… is because you think that's right, too."

Angelus’ eyes lower away from the fireplace, sliding along the floor until his head is bowed, staring down at the floor. His lips flicker as he stares intently at a single spot. He doesn’t have to watch what he says. He doesn’t have to fear it anymore. Blinking first, the youth looks up at Madeline’s compliment. His lips twitch, as if he was trying to force a smile, but his sorrowful expression remains. “I- I-“ Angelus shifts on his feet before taking him a bit closer to the girl. “Yea, I believe in my culture, Evans. And my club…” A sigh escapes him. “Malfoy. Black. They aren’t like Flint. They’ve always been there, friends. I could stand up to Flint, but I’d be turning my back on them.” He makes a grand gesture with his empty hand around him to the exit. “Auror Odori had to know. You said they were trapped? That’s not right.” His lips twist and he lets out a snort. “I don’t feel brave, Evans. I feel like I just stabbed the rest of the Magijugend in the back.” His eyes close and he lifts a hand to pinch the bridge of his nose, but it apparently does no good as he lowers his hand. A tear trickles from one eye so that he fervently flicks two fingers over it. “You don’t care, but I’m sorry I made you cry. I’m sorry I made you miserable.” With that, he spins away and aims his self towards the stairs leading to the dorms.

Madeline scratches aimlessly at her page without looking up, making little cross-hatches until she runs out of ink - and just keeps scratching away anyways. "But that is brave. When you think your friends 're wrong - and you'll stand up even to them," she says quietly. She glances up as he's walking away, her own eyes wet, and her gaze uncertain. She still doesn't understand. She sighs loudly, and tries to return her attention to her work - but it's hard.

Pausing by the first steps of the stairs, Angelus slowly shakes his head, thinking. His hand lifts to wipe away tears before he swings around, locking his gaze on Madeline again. His hand squeezes a little at the broken tool. “Then why do I feel so awful for them?” He frowns, shooting a glance to a distant wall. With a shake of his head and a sigh, he glances back to the girl. “Auror Odori always speaks with so much sense. Making her a full Auror was the best thing whoever in charge could have done.” He draws in a breath and lets it out slowly. “I’ve made the wrong choices.” A snort escapes him followed by a ‘heh’. “I’m probably still going to make terrible choices. But I don’t have to follow Flint’s orders and upset people anymore.” He lifts a hand to wave his self off, stepping up onto the steps.

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